We are from Cedar, we shall not be moved

Disclaimer: if this post seems really disjointed, it's because it is... I wrote it at different parts of the day.

While I was showering today (I'm a morning shower person) I was thinking (as usual) about things and somehow or other while I was thinking about what to do about C I suddenly was reminded of an old cheer from very long ago...

We are from Cedar, we shall not be moved

We are from Cedar, we shall not be moved

Like the trees that are planted by the waterside

We shall not be moved

I hated cheering when I was in sec sch even though they all made us do it while jogging. While the rest of the class would happily cheer and jog, the only time when I joined in was when we were going to reach the teachers who actually give us a mark on our cheering during jogging! (so as to give the best class the 'jogging award' based on punctuality in reporting, jogging organisation, and cheers) When we passed the teachers I would join in just to give the class a boost on behalf of those in the class who really wanted the award.

Anyway that's not the point. The point is that I felt this applied to me this morning because if someone needs help, I will give it, and I shall not be moved, just like the trees that are planted by the waterside. Actually I'm even glad that it's me and not someone else. Because with my music and my friends and my generally optimistic nature I do take it better than someone else does, and of course, nobody else will be hurt.

"If it's really in your nature to hurt others, if seeing the pain of another makes you feel better, then go ahead. But if it's not your nature to hurt others, is it really worthwhile to hurt yourself and those who care for you?" - an sms that I wanted to send to C but decided it was not the right time yet.

Lol... why am I so accommodating to everyone to this extent? I practically run around trying to please people. Probably I'd make a wonderful sidekick, not to mention that I can execute a pretty good side kick though my specialty was always the backthrust, hah. (sorry, prior taekwondo training)

Brilliant. Nambi sent me a link that at first I thought meant 'a fine' because i saw 'fa kuan' in the link and I thought of 罚款, ((a) fine) but soon realised that it was an exceedingly interesting chinese poem/tongue-twister. Here's the link and you can go read it for yourself: http://www.fa-kuan.muc.de/SHISHI.RXML we had a good laugh over it :p it also has a recording of someone reading it, on the right of a pair of recordings. I wonder how my grandmother would pronounce it in Teochew. I can't pronounce all of it unfortunately... while I can speak and use the dialect functionally, if you ask me to read out a Chinese newspaper article in Teochew I'd get stuck within a few characters. Yeah, it's quite pathetic but at the same time I'm aware that my ability to speak dialect is already on the upper tier in comparison to others of my generation. I don't know which is more pathetic, honestly, my own lack of ability at my dialect or the general lack of ability. Dialects are dying out in China as well because people would rather teach their children 'Putonghua', in other words Mandarin. Now that my grandmother is senile I can no longer ask her to teach me Teochew. I can't help but feel as if I have let her down.

Hmm... I seem to carry so much guilt inside me, to different people, at different times, for different situations... I guess I should have a significant ability to be able to block certain bad memories of guilt or else I would be depressed all the time. Maybe some people are more susceptible to becoming depressed because they are less able to block out the bad memories?

I was just washing up my hands when I saw the dish for the bar soap that I use. I see it every day, but today I was reminded of the soap dish that I made when i was in Sec 1, for D&T. That was the first item that we made, I think. The second was a wooden sign to hang on a door that I painted with watercolours that got onto my pencil box (bright green paint on a grubby, old, torn pencil box that I started using in Sec 1 and still use now) and Stayed there until I finally washed it um... years later? Gosh, I was really a slob, haha. (still am in a lot of ways actually)

Anyway, back to the soap dish... we were making it and I had finished everything except for the supports to hold the dish up. We were supposed to bend the side flaps on the sheet of metal to form the supports. Because it was our first project, the teacher Mrs Lee helped us bend the flaps around a wooden pole of sorts and everyone ended up with a circular support, which really didn't fit into my idea of aesthetics. I took a look at theirs and decided that I wanted an S-shaped support instead of a circular support, so when it was my turn to have my support 'made' I asked if I could have an S-shaped one. She took one look at me and then said, "You can't do that, it's too difficult." I thought, "Alright fine, since you won't help me, I'll do it myself." And that's exactly what I did. I bent it first on one side around the pole, then on the other side (if you look at the S it is circular first one side then the other), then I handed it in. She gave me a very high mark.

I still remember Mrs Lee, who later liked to say to my best friend Joyce, "Joyce, are you alright? Do you need counselling?" because Mrs Lee was a teacher counsellor (in other words the school trained her to be able to counsel students. You have no idea how scary that is). And still later I once saw her in church, which might or might not have been her. Other than Mrs Lee though, I did meet Mrs Doris Foong in St Francis Xavier church though, which was a real... hide-face moment :p It wasn't really that she was my antithesis in sec sch or something, just that it's really weird to meet a teacher from so long ago that you're not close to, and then you have a conversation and you're scrambling through your mind wondering what you could possibly say.

Speaking of D&T, when I was young the only hammer we had at home was a hammer made by my uncle when he was in school. Because I had never seen another hammer, I thought that it was normal and even store-bought, because the handle looked perfect (probably ready made and just affixed onto the metal part). So, I always thought that that was the proper kind of hammer and wondered why pictures of hammers always showed a different style of hammer :p. It's almost like research with colours. If you grew up learning that red colour was really green colour, in a world where the colours were inverted, how would you know that red isn't really green? It's a really fascinating idea and made me lie awake sometimes wondering what aspect of my own perception was 'abnormal' but I thought was perfectly normal. It boils down to 'how do you know that what you know is the truth?' which of course starts to go into the region of philosophy that I'll spare you from (and myself, from typing) but even then, it's pretty fascinating.

Oh... not much about my day again... Today I basically charged my way through 5 hymns, arrangements and all. I don't even know how I did it. I wanted to give up so many times, especially when I couldn't find my manuscript book to write down my arrangements. So what I did I will have to practically get from off the top of my head the next time I practise. I was seriously frustrated but each time I got up one part of me (Self 1, Self 2) pleaded with the other part, 'just one more?' and somehow or other, I did it. I pushed my fingers too hard today though... 6 hours of practise is just too much for anyone. I even fitted in half an hour of Spohr Variations at the end because my lesson is next week and argh! How in the world am I supposed to do all of this in two weeks?? My forearm hurts. Privately I'm always paranoid that I might get an injury. I already suspect that I have a bit of carpel tunnel especially in my left index finger because I always tend to push my left hand, especially so this year after I finally learned that my technique that I had been using for years was all wrong. Pray that this doesn't all result in a career-ending injury. There, paranoid, but with good cause. I don't know anyone else in music faculty who gets aches like I do, even before I start practising. But can't possibly get to the doc's right now, with so many performances coming up...bummer.

Over-ambitious me has such a crazy programme for next year I don't even know how I'm supposed to manage them all. And I'm supposed to be able to retire two of the 7 pieces I'm going to play in Year 3, by december (end of Year 3 sem 1). Madness! Just what have you done, Karen? All of this just to be able to do post-graduate studies in a good school. Honestly though, I've never been so academically oriented, as in, I have never wanted to get into a good school so badly. Mostly I just floated into whatever was available. Jasmine says I've changed. Indeed. I've changed so much. Perhaps it's because previously when I was in sec sch and jc, I was never able to be fully free to pursue my passion. And now that I tasted freedom, I just want to fly higher, and higher, and higher.

Sometimes my tenacity and level of motivation (or maybe just stubbornness to keep pushing on) frightens me. Gulia (my harp teacher) tells me that I am a lot more ambitious than Huang Yin, my classmate. Perhaps so. But also perhaps not. A lot of the time I'm not even sure what exactly my goal is, where I want to stop, just that I want to keep getting better.

My mind is reeling. Too many thoughts are jostling for space. It's again time to tell my brain 'shut up and get to bed', though sleep tonight will probably be occupied by thoughts. Anyway, goodnight!

A new return

Hmm... Colin challenged me to write a diary entry every day so here it is. I changed the title from 'Life is not a routine' to 'Lux et Nox' (which for you non-Google Translate users, means 'Light and Darkness' in my broken Latin (sorry..!)) after the titles of 'Lux Aurumque' my favorite choral song and another work by the same composer Eric Whitacre, 'Nox Aurumque'. Also because I like the idea of life being about light and darkness. So there it is.

When Colin first challenged me to write in a diary every day, I objected of course, and said, "I tried to write one so many times that I gave up, because I never managed to be able to persist." Plus there are so many things that happen throughout the day that no diary entry is going to be able to keep track of them all. Mainly I suspect that I'm long-winded, but then again summary was never my forte when I was taking O level English (since my English was good, maybe summary could be my mezzoforte? Hmmm... :p) but I think long-windedness might stem from my unwillingness/paranoia of potentially missing important details. But I guess I'll just leave my memory to fill in the blanks. After all what's a good memory for? :) Another reason why I never liked to write diary entries was because, as I explained to Colin, I love to talk to people and as I talk, the events of the day naturally come out by themselves and my chatlogs essentially become my diary, which is great because chatlogs never forget any parts of the conversation: they are saved for posterity (and used against you in the canonisation process if you're like Redbad aka Eibert Stroband aiming to become pope, then canonised as a saint :p)

Honestly though, I miss writing, in a way. I kept this blog because I've always liked the simplicity of black. Not to mention that it's gentle on my eyes. And over the years I've written little things, even when I wasn't blogging actively, that I felt were important to me at the time. Looking back at some of the posts I made, I smile because I can no longer remember many of these experiences. But I'm glad that I have a record, because no matter how much you talk to others, not everything that you want to say can come out as the other person turns the topic to other areas. Not to mention that I've been more reflective and less chatty recently. Plus, knowing the forgetfulness of people and our lack of thankfulness, this would probably be a good place to remind me, that there is always goodness in the world. As Youying posted in FB (a quote from another place) "Life is like a piano. The white keys are the good experiences and the black keys are the bad experiences. But all the keys come together to form a beautiful melody." I commented and said, "Well, luckily for us, the white keys outnumber the black..." Indeed, even if sometimes it feels that we're constantly playing on the black keys, just remember that even Chopin's 'Black Keys' Waltz is in an annoyingly bright major. Just like the bright major pieces that dominate the harp repertory. When I was in a bad mood and just wanted a dark minor piece to vent my frustration on, all I had was the annoyingly bright and cheery Spohr Variations to keep me company. Still, the music did keep me company and I felt better afterwards.

I'm beginning to understand why I'm so long and rambly: because when I think of one thing, my mind will go on to the next thing (even if it's only very vaguely related) and the next, and the next... no wonder when I was once asked to write an essay about 联想 (association of ideas), I couldn't write anything remotely resembling an organised essay because I just kept writing down things that my mind was generating, faster than I could write them down. In the end I gave up and pleaded to be excused from the assignment. I think the teacher took pity on me and allowed me to skip that essay... phew. Connections. That's it. My mind makes connections easily.

Hmm... let's see... I've written a bunch and nothing about my day yet! Hah. That's me for you I guess. Hmm... maybe one should start with a little about yesterday when I finally got back to Singapore after the Italy trip. Probably the most important thing is that I was reconciled with one of my oldest friends. We parted ways in Dec 2008, after 7 years of friendship, and at the time I didn't have an idea why she was so angry with me other than me not making the effort to speak to her in a month. (clueless then, still often clueless now unfortunately) but as we talked I finally understood that it happened because I had been neglecting the friendship for a long time. She said that she was always the one initiating activities, chats and etc (she's right) and that I was starting to become more and more distant from her and not telling her much about my own activities. Even important events in my life I did not mention to her. Sigh. I have done wrong to so many people in my life but I'm glad that I have another chance at this friendship. She said that I'd changed (she's right) and really I've always felt (and been amused by the idea) that if 15 year old me were to look at 20 year old me the 15 year old me would probably be pretty horrified. I felt so awkward about the whole idea of hugging (even between girls) in sec sch! Plus a whole bunch of other things. I still feel shy a lot of the time in the physical department.

Then I spent a large portion of the night listening to Hazel and Colin (conference call), two very interesting people who have their own issues to settle. Well, we all do. But Colin and I have been mentoring each other, we take turns... when I have a problem, he advises me. When he has a problem, I advise him, and then... I use the precise same words of advice he gave to me, on him! Yes, I'm evil, hehe. But isn't that what friendship is about? Indeed. Colin is one of the few friends who are still around, even after our AJchoir days (of course, being in the same church choir probably has a lot to do with it, but even then he has always been insightful and conversations with him have always ended up with both of us learning something new). Hmm... looking back at what I wrote, I realise how, and how often, I mention Colin. No wonder so many people thought that there's something going on between the two of us. Haha. Well, just that our lives do intersect a lot, but there is nothing going on except a very affectionate friendship. I love the fact that Colin is one of the few guys who is willing to treat me like any of his buddies. He even calls me 'Hey brudder!' sometimes, which secretly makes me very happy, haha. There was a bit of panic round about March when I feared that he liked me and he feared that I liked him because we were misreading the signs completely. Luckily we got that sorted out and I was so relieved when it was confirmed that we didn't like each other. So all's good.

This morning I woke up late even though I'm no longer suffering from jet-lag. Tried to continue with my project to re-arrange various hymns for performance in ACS(I)'s 'Day of Prayer'. Was then interrupted by two people who grossly overstayed their welcome (alright, just joking :p) and I played my harp for Hazel who has never heard me play the harp live before. It was wonderful to make her happy. Then we chatted and laughed... I haven't laughed so much in a long time. Partly because when I laugh my family members get annoyed and say that I have an annoying laugh. They're probably right, but the only time when I feel completely uninhibited is when I am with my friends. They already know about my craziness, so I am perfectly fine with doing pretty much everything. Except for the one single time when I shocked them with a comment that they still bring up in conversations when we meet up. Lol. Anyway I guess laughing less is part of maturation and on some level I was consciously aware of giving up laughter to focus on more serious thinking instead.

Hmm... Hazel wanted to see my room, and she did. I showed her the Carpisa turtle that I got from Italy (during our choir competition there in 2008) that more resembles a soft toy than a functional, albeit small, backpack. Then I told her that I've always wanted to use the backpack but I was getting far too old to be able to use it. As I looked in the mirror, I said, "You know, I've the craziest idea..." then proceeded to tie my hair up in two ponytails at the side for a laugh, to suit the turtle backpack. Hazel then suggested that maybe I could find a suit that makes me look really young and then go out with the two ponytails and the backpack. Hazel thought that it would be fun. Colin thought it was funny and was sniggering the whole time. I thought that it was both fun and funny :D anyways i found something that both of them said 'pass' to and all to do is to wait for a good day to *cough* premiere the outfit. I can't help sniggering here as well.

After they left I finally managed to get down to doing my arrangements and I attacked 'Be Thou My Vision', probably my favorite hymn of all time. I think my introduction doesn't really fit my arrangement for the main section, but beggars (of time) can't be choosers. Especially so because I still have another 11 hymns to look at (I'm playing 14 in total, they're really short though). But if I manage to fill up 25 minutes, I'll do less.

When I got on msn today, I saw offline messages from Jasmine which is fine because we really should start talking more. I won't be losing another friend in the same way if I can help it. And then I also received a response from C. Of course I'm not 100% sure that it's for me but hey at least I know that C is alright, in some form of way. And I had been just about to ask Jinjun, a majorly nice and friendly person at OMM (Orchestra of the Music Makers), to call C up and check on C. Anyways, C said, "All I wanna do is to hurt someone, and it might as well be you.". Well, if that is indeed C's aim, C is definitely succeeding but well, that's alright. I haven't felt so happy about a negative statement before (not at least that I remember). At least C is responding! And I know that C might seem cruel now, but C's nature is to care for others and this state won't go on forever. And... if my temporary suffering helps C, then let it be so. I would rather suffer myself than to see anyone else suffer.

It seems that my wish, that I would be filled with love for all mankind, is coming to pass. Nowadays I no longer feel any deep-seated sorrow except for others. Colin says it's 'agape' (Greek word) love. How beautiful that love is! That I might be able to keep on loving others even if they do not appreciate or even know about it.

Ubi caritas et amor Deus ibi est: where charity and love are, God is there.

I love that song. Then again I love to sing, to vocalise. Hmm, that's actually where I learn most of my Latin (and by extension, a little bit of Italian), plus I absolutely love the pure vowels in Latin and Italian. They just seem to resonate somehow. Oh, speaking of Italian, I realised that in Italy I could read a surprising amount of stuff. So I figured that if I knew so much already, I might as well continue and learn it as my 3rd language. Not many people use it, but it's such a pleasure to be able to use the successor of Latin that it surpasses the disadvantages, I feel. I would like even more to be able to learn Latin but then it's tough to get the material for it. Happily nowadays we have Google Translate, so at least if I don't understand my Italian books I can type in stuff and get it translated.

Anyway, it seems like I don't have anything else constructive to say, so bye for now.

Why do you want to join the Cashflow challenge?

I first learnt about Cashflow from a friend. I had a number of friends in my faculty who were interested in learning about how to generate passive income: although being a musician seems very glamorous and lucrative, the reality is that a lot of us have to spend large sums of money just to get decent sounding instruments, our source of income is extremely unpredictable and the amount of income that we get is often small. If you look at the Singapore Symphony Orchestra, the musicians are not paid a great deal. They spend years in training, with instruments that can easily cost $30 000 to $60 000 or more, and are paid about $5000 per month on average, after long rehearsals. In short, we have high costs, and a small and unstable income. This is one of the reasons why orchestra musicians have been ranked as having the 2nd lowest job satisfaction scores - worse than a cleaner!

I was given the best wakeup call when I performed for an upscale hotel over the holidays and was paid $600 for 4 hours work. That is really good pay even by most music standards, and the hotel also offered to engage me to play for them every week at a rate of $120 per hour, 2 hours per session (professionals would probably earn about $140 per hour). Again it seems like a lot and initially I was happy. But then I did the math and it comes up to $960 a month. Music engagements are not very common even for professionals, and yes, I would probably have to live with that kind of income in a month, for most months. That's okay right now because I'm living with my parents. But if I lived alone, I probably couldn't make it a whole month on that alone. I am definitely not financially independent, and neither can I forsee becoming financially independent for a long time to come.

It is for this reason that my parents have advised me to give up music after I finish studying, and instead concentrate on doing a business. But that is not what I want to do. I have an endless passion for music and I really want to have a career in this field, but without financial independence, I can hardly insist that my parents support my dreams of becoming a musician. After all, they are not obliged to pay for me indefinitely, nor do they have the ability to do so.

The best way in which I can sum it up is to say that, I want to gain financial intelligence as much as possible so that I can be financially independent and be free to follow my dreams of becoming a professional musician, and I believe that Cashflow will be a great help on that. Thanks for hearing me out!

Random

my Top 3(more if I can think of 'em =p) list of stupidest things to do while on the phone.

1. "Hello? It's me."
2. Gesturing to the person on the other side of the line.
3. Talking on msn/yahoo messenger with the person simultaneously.

Impact of an Obama defeat

As published in 'The Guardian', written by Jonathan Freedland. None of the following content is owned by me.

The feeling is familiar. I had it four years ago and four years before that: A sinking feeling in the stomach. It's a kind of physical pessimism which says: "Oh no, it's happening again. The Democrats are about to lose an election they should win - and it could not matter more."

Look at Tuesday's opinion polls, which have Mr John McCain either in a dead heat with Mr Barack Obama or narrowly ahead. Given the well-documented tendency of African-American candidates to perform better in polls than in elections - thanks to people who say they will vote for a black man but don't - this suggests Mr Obama is now trailing badly.

More troubling was the ABC News-Washington Post survey, which found Mr McCain ahead among white women by 53 per cent to 41 per cent. Two weeks ago, Mr Obama had a 15-per-cent lead among women. There is only one explanation for that turnaround, and it was not Mr McCain's tranquilliser of a convention speech: Mr Obama's lead has been crushed by the Palin bounce.

Alaskan Governor Palin has so far slipped out of reach, no revelation - no matter how jaw-dropping were it applied to a normal candidate - doing sufficient damage to slow her apparent march to power.

We know Palin is lying when she says she was against the notorious US$400-million "Bridge to Nowhere" project in Alaska - in fact, she campaigned for it - but she keeps repeating the claim anyway. She denounces the dipping of snouts in the Washington trough - but hired costly lobbyists to make sure Alaska got a bigger helping of federal dollars than any other state in the union.

She claims to be a fiscal conservative, but left the tiny town of Wasilla, where she served as mayor, saddled with debts it had never had before. She even claimed "per diem" allowances - taxpayers' money meant for out-of-town travel - when she was staying in her own house.

Yet, somehow, none of this is yet leaving a dent.

If Mrs Sarah Palin wins this for the charisma-deprived McCain, what will be the reaction? Yes, blue-state America will go into mourning once again. A generation of young Americans - who back Mr Obama in big numers - will turn cynical, concluding that politics doesn't work after all. And, most depressing, many African-Americans will decide that if even Mr Obama - with all his conspicuous gifts - could not win, then no black man can ever be elected president.

But what of the rest of the world? For Obama has stirred an excitement around the globe unmatched by any US politician in living memory.

Polling in Germany, France, Britain and Russia shows that he would win by whopping majorities, with the pattern repeated in Africa, Asia, the Middle East and Latin America. If the free world could choose on Nov 4, Obama would be President.

Non-Americans sense that Mr Obama will not ride roughshod over the international system but will treat alliances and global institutions seriously: Mr McCain wants to bypass the United Nations in favour of a US-friendly League of Democracies. Mr McCain might talk a good game on climate change, but a repeated floor chant at the Republican convention was "Drill, baby, drill!", as if the solution to global warming were not a radical rethink of the US' entire energy system but more offshore oil rigs.

If Americans choose Mr McCain, they will be turning their back on the rest of the world.

Until now, anti-Americanism has mostly been anti-Bushism, opposition to this specific administration. But if Mr McCain wins, that might well change. Suddenly, Europeans and others will conclude that their dispute is with not only one ruling clique, but Americans themselves.

And the manner of that decision will matter, too. If it is deemed to have been about race - that Mr Obama was rejected because of his colour - the world's verdict will be harsh. Even if it's not ethnic prejudice, but some other aspect of the culture wars that proves decisive, the point still holds.

For America to make a decision as grave as this one - while the planet boils and with the US fighting two wars - on the trivial basis that a hockey mum is likeable and seems down to earth, would be to convey a fleeing from reality. Let's not forget, Mr McCain's campaign manager boasts that this eleciton is "not about the issues".

What does it say about today's America, that the world's esteem for Mr Obama is unwanted? If Americans reject him, they will be sending the clearest possible message to the rest of us - and, make no mistake, we shall hear it.

Don't mind me I'm watching game movies! lol

How to recognise a Japanese game without seeing any Japanese words/lyrics etc:
1. Costumes are modelled after traditional Japanese costumes e.g. kimono
2. Traditional Japanese values e.g. humility and trying to take the blame are common
3. There is a strong connection with other living things, the spirits in trees, animals etc.

And, of course, almost everyone involved in the production process are Japanese! The Japanese are fantastic patriots.

Vocal Consort

the other day swee hao asked the choir members whether they were interested in joining the vocal consort choir for a performance with the singapore chinese orchestra(sco). i wasn't particularly interested in joining vocal consort but i jumped at the chance to perform with the sco again. last year i did really enjoy performing in the sco concert and singing all sorts of buddhist songs, most of which i'd never even heard of.

so swee warned us that if we wanted to join even one practice, we would have to stick with it all the way unti9l the performance. so it was with some trepidation that i went down to siglap south cc today to join the vocal consort practice.

btw the sop SL looks super young even though i think she is probably much older than i am. think she only looks young because she is so very fair. the other members are rather much older than us actually.

I met one aj choir alumni who said that she didn't join the alumni choir. i told her that the guys' uniforms are now changed to the banana suits and she was rather surprised. her comment was 'yuck'. but she seemed nice enough, and told me that she was 22. she said that she felt extremely old among us, but actually when i looked towards the guys' section, i could see some singers that looked as though they were 30 years old or even older. i told her that, and also that there were some secondary school singers in vocal consort. i guessed that due to the o levels, they had been given leave to study for their exams. kane, the aj choir member who is also an official member of vocal consort, was also absent.

so we sang carols. some of them sounded quite nice, but what left the deepest impression on me(perhaps it was because i had heard it before?) was actually the song called 'O holy night' strangely, whose music sounded as sad as the lyrics sounded celebratory, just like the 'god bless you merry gentlemen'

after that i headed back home because my parents said that they would not be fetching. hazel called me up to ask where i was. she told me that she was taking the bus. i wanted to take the bus too but i had no idea where she had gone. so i decided to just take the route i had taken before: take the bus to an mrt station and go home from there. on the way though, i met zongyi who jaywalked me wailing to the other side of the road.

we discussed many matters: perhaps too many and as we approached the bus stop where we were supposed to take our bus we met hazel and colin. on the bus since zongyi wanted to sit with hazel, so i sat with colin.(he's still deeply in love with the kwei, btw... or so that's what he says =p)

colin recommended some methods of getting somebody to like you. method 1: use black magic, which apparently involved some weird ingredients including 4 locks of hair(easy to come by if you're just starting on chemo) and bat's eyes and a pig's heart, which had to be halal. goodness knows how that can possibly come about. and also some other strange ingredients which i have forgotten. he instructed, 'and don't forget to speak the name of the person you wish to bewitch loud and clear. then you dance around the pot where you have put all the ingredients.' when asked afterwards what to do with the strange brew in the pot, he replied that one had to drink it. when asked what would happen if one vomited, he recalled some important ingredient and said, 'well it doesn't really matter because you have to put in bat's vomit anyway' that was method 1, folks

method 2: engage the services of a certain arrow-shooting pal of his called cupid. no idea on how that can work. lol. and that's method 2.

good luck! you'll need lots of it if you believe in colin. =p

Everyone assumes that I'm SUPER free

Yep. Promos are over.

Finished the last paper, geog, at around 5.45 or so.

Rushed home to start practising piano. until around 11.30(I put on the damper pedal, so don't worry).

Woke up at 6.50 to go for choir which was from 8 to 11.30. Nearly shouted at the student conductor even though he didn't do much to irritate me. In any case his ego is so huge that he would probably just brush it off anyway.

Rushed home again to continue practising piano until 1.30 when I left to go for my piano lesson. I actually hadn't finished practising yet.

Lesson lasted from 1.45 to 3.45. Immediately rushed home to do PW.

And everyone thinks that I'm extremely free! How great!

For your information, I study Norwegian. Thank you.

Today is the day before we move house. My mum and I were removing the books from my cupboard when we stumbled on this comic. My mum asked me what it was, all the words she couldn't read. I told her that it was from the time we travelled in the Nordic countries of Norway, Sweden, Finland and Denmark. Since I know that Norweigian, Swedish and Danish is very similar and the text didn't seem in any way similar to Norweigian, I concluded that it was Finnish and told my mother that it was a Finnish comic. Her reply to that was, "Oh, you study Finnish what right? You take and read lor." For your information, I study Norwegian. Thank you.

Whee! Lol....

Oh yay.... yet another quiz...... lol.....

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents,
beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home
decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

Happy Birthday to Penelope!!

ahh!! ahh!! ahh!!!!!! I almost forgot!!!!! *flaps arms up and down*!! ahh!! I can't forget your birthday, or I'll never forgive myself...haha....and so.....



HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!



to my most beloved junior.... haha! (and the norweigian equivalent of that(hope you still remember that I learn norweigian...) is 'Gratulere med dagen'!) You must send me an email about your life soon, now that it's the june holidays. Alternatively, you can send me the link to your blog.... *smiles* look forward to knowing more!

*plays music*
Happy birthday to you....
Happy birthday to you....
Happy birthday to Penelope!
Happy birthday to you!

Oh btw... a lame joke.....
Q: What is the oldest letter in the alphabet?
A: 'U', because for every birthday that anyone celebrates, the letter 'U' celebrates it three times.

Of course, there is always the issue of the blood group becoming 'A+U', but nevermind....

Btw, I hope you still remember your promise to me after I told you my O level results.... I will keep that in mind too.... tsk tsk tsk..... now you're only one year younger than me! You're 15 while I'm 16.... Heehee.....

P.S. I still read those messages that S1 wrote to me in that little purple calendar-like thingy....

Shaving

lalalalala...... (if I had said this on msn a very nice penguin smiley will come out). Anyway.... today two people shaved for quite a long time in school outside the audi.... strange place to do so isn't it? ....speaking of shaving! Today Zongyi was reminding the girls to go shave for wednesday's TPJC concert.

Mr Terrence Toh was a little confused and then said, "What do you girls have to shave?? Your have nothing to shave what...." then both Guowei and Zongyi were trying to explain in a way that would not be too embarrassing to all parties present. Unfortunately though, dear Mr Toh was still pretty clueless. In the end Zongyi had no choice but to tell him that the girl's choir uniforms are sleeveless. At this... oh! it was so funny! His face actually turned as red as..... hmm.... Amanda's face! lol... oh my.... haha...

haha... I think I will probably remember this shaving episode very clearly in my mind because that was the first time I ever shaved.... haha.........*shrugs* strange how people remember some things while forgetting others.... Don't you wonder what your life was like in those memories that you have already forgotten.... I guess they just become more untold stories that fade from memory with time...... just like the sands of the desert...(remember zereglee? haha!)

Okay...

So yes. SYF is coming. (what the heck else do you expect me to say???!!!) SYF has been dominating the minds(and mines) of the SYF team choir members. At the expense of more recessive thoughts.

I suppose recre-choir(recreation choir) members have it a little easier... It was really funny when Aggie(our choir president) started off about our resident 'recre-choir'. To cut a long story short(and shot), some people not in the SYF team have called themselves that, after the fashion of sports CCAs. For example, those not in the badminton school team are members of recre-bad(recreation badminton). They shouldn't, really... One does not expect members of sports CCAs to have a very good fashion sense. Just look at their competition wear and our competition wear... I don't have to say any more, do I?

End of story.

Anyway, a whole lot of weird thingys have been happening... Strange that weird=happening, but that's none of my business.

• SL(Service Learning) discussion was today. We finished 25 minutes before the bell rang and ended up talking about our class outing. They changed the date so many times that I don't even remember what it is now.

• I went to the school library looking for a book that according to my GP(General Paper) tutor I was supposed to read. When I finally got to the library, I forgot the title of the book I was supposed to be looking for. Didn't have (anything or anyone) to reference to with me at the time. Told the nice(and suffering) librarian that I would come back later when I had the title of the book firmly in my head. (anyway, I forgot entirely about the whole business until after the library had closed.)

• I went to the bookshop today(after going to the library)(and anyway the bookshop is close to the library) and spent $9.10 in 4 trips.

Trip 1:

Purchased foolscap paper(for writing on) and red pen(for writing on the foolscap paper)(and marking my assignments)(and peer-marking other people's assignments). Btw the bookshop stocks 'Ballsign' and 'Gellyroll' red pens at the same price. Tried out the inks of both pens and found them the same. Guess that means that 'Ballsign' is the new name of 'Gellyroll'...

Foolscap: $1.30
Red pen: $1
Total: $2.30


Walked to my locker and deposited the foolscap. Remembered that I had meant to get a hole puncher for a long time so that I could file my geog(raphy) notes. Walked back to the bookshop.

Trip 2:

Spent a long time looking at all the different hole punchers(not that there's a large variety, they only stock three different kinds of hole punchers there). Was rather tempted to buy a relatively more expensive(but comes with more features) model. Then I reminded myself that I had already spent $2.30 at the bookshop today. Got the least expensive one.

Hole puncher: $2.30
Total: $4.60


Walked to the locker again to get my geog file. Found the locker really messy. Tidyed up everything in the locker. Then I helped someone open their locker because the door had become stuck. Went back to my locker. Found my eraser that I had been looking for for a long time. Apparently it got stuck between the pages of my chinese workbook. Anyway, my geog file was not there. Realised that I must have brought it home some time ago. Shut the locker and walk up to the third level outside the choir room where my bag was. Continue doing homework. Make some mistakes(using a pen too!). Am reminded for the (approx., lets say I am reminded once a day for... say... a month?) 30th time that my liquid paper has run out. Thought about correcting the mistakes only when I get home, but then I remembered that I have neither correction tape nor liquid paper at home. Have no choice but to go back down again to the bookshop to get something to correct my mistakes with.

Trip 3:

Think the bookshop uncle is quite mystified by this strange girl who keeps going in and out of his shop buying things one at a time instead of buying them all at once. Spent yet more time choosing which liquid paper to buy(not that there's much to choose from, there's only one brand: Pentel) Mentally calculated using price and volume to see which one was more worth it compared to the others. Apparently, the larger the volume you buy, the more worth it it is. So I got the one with the largest volume. Yes I know I'm thrifty. Thanks.

Pentel 12 ml correction fluid: $4.50
Total: $9.10


I walked back to the benches outside the choir room. On the way, I met Joyce. She said she was bored and waiting for her next lesson, so we walked up and down the science block together. After some time, we walked back to outside the choir room. Decided to test drive my liquid paper. By gosh, it is really 'liquid' paper! When I squeezed it, only water came out. Go to the bookshop with Joyce(cos she's bored) to complain.

Trip 4:

By now I believe the bookshop uncle is quite tired of seeing me. Go instead to the bookshop auntie, who by some miraculous process, manages to revive my liquid paper and bring it back to life. Finally leave the bookshop for the last time.

• I can't remember the last time I bathed. Presumably it was yesterday. Then again, I don't really remember when I bathed. *looks at clothes* Okay... I suppose I did bathe yesterday then...

• My parents(yes, plural) forgot to go to the doctor to get the replacement antibiotics. Parents attempt to play doctor.

Yes. That's about it. Ah well... Choir tomorrow morning at 9.30 in the choir room... Have to go sleep...

Term 2 Day One

Whee! Everyone's in the AJ uniform now, and oh, what chaos on the first day of school... It's really quite funny at times... when I walked in and saw Nambi sitting at the benches, he actually said, "I was wondering why that girl looked so familiar..."

Other than that, Kenneth looks rather like Howard in this new uniform! Especially with that haircut. The spectacles aren't that alike though... haha...

Carol wrote in my warm fuzzy! Thanks Carol, for that, and for reading the rather silly message I wrote... but you knew what I wrote... after all, you were sitting just next to me in photojournalism lecture doing your warm fuzzy too! haha!

Well, day one of term 2 over, let's see what day two brings...

Names??

Lol... Tried out this name generator....

Your movie star name: Peanuts Koh
Your fashion designer name is Koh Brussels
Your socialite name is Carrot Cake Singapore
Your fly girl / guy name is K Kar
Your detective name is Horse Cedar
Your barfly name is Pineapple Tart None
Your soap opera name is Joo Huang Brighton Crescent
Your rock star name is Weather's Original Cheetah
Your Star Wars name is Kohfid Karnam
Your punk rock band name is The Contented Maths

Strange indeed...

*grin*

*grins and shows all my teeth* To anyone out there who is free enough to tag me, do tell me in some way, e.g. email...? or a comment will do. Otherwise, I'll never see that I'm tagged. Which is good in a way... *grins in the same way again* Hee!

Btw... the unseasonably warm(or some would say hot) weather(due to global warming) has caused me to come out of hibernation! Lol!

Oh man, that really reminds me of my favorite comic 'Calvin and Hobbes'(not to be confused with my brothers, they are 'Kelvin and Stanley'(HAHA!)) Basically, Calvin was having the hiccups, and he told Hobbes to scare him, and Hobbes started to say something like, 'Global warming is accelerating beyond our control, our oceans are filling up with garbage...' etc etc. Of course, that didn't cure Calvin's hiccups... the story is continued in the next comic. And it's really funny. To date, I haven't found a person that doesn't laugh at the end of that particular story yet. Heehee! There are two 'Calvin and Hobbes' books in my new school's library!! Yay!!

I am obliged to put up this post

Alright, so I have been asked to put up a post. Here it is. Now let me go into hibernation again for another six months.

Some good experiences and bad experiences

Today I went to another school(other than my school of course) to try out the piano that we would be using for our 'O' level music practical exams. As this school is a Music Elective Programme(MEP) school, it is the exam centre for a few other non-MEP schools, so my new music teacher(the previous one went to NZ for further studies) requested for us to try out the exam piano. I must say that I was extremely surprised that the music teacher in the school agreed. Competition among schools is often extremely fierce, and the music teacher of that school was really nice to let us try out the exam venue. When we left, she was also very nice, telling us patiently which bus to take.

I cannot say the same of one pupil though. I admit that I am from Cedar Girls' Secondary School(so who's going to throw eggs at me?), and the pupils from my school and the pupils from the other school are not exactly on very good terms. I used to wonder why this was so. I once asked my senior, how come we hate that school so much, so much that at international competitions, we would rather support the teams that are not from Singapore than support that school? She replied that since they didn't like us, so we didn't like them too. Which I found a very unconvincing reason.

However, I finally realised why there was such an 'enemity' between the two schools. I was waiting at the front porch/foyer/whatever-you-call-it of the school to be cleared by the security guard so that we could enter. That's when I saw a girl sitting down, with a green cast on her left foot. The cast was scribbled all over with words and I found myself thinking why people often like to write things on casts. That's when I heard her say, very clearly, to her friend: "Oh, Cedar?? Aiyah, all the students are all stupid lah!!" If someone said that about your school, what would you think??

Most importantly, no one in Cedar says, "Oh, school X?? All the students are all stupid!" At least we have a lot more manners.

My star sign is VIRGO????!!

I don't know how Blogger managed to get this, but my star sign is most definitely NOT Virgo. It's Libra. Very weird. I apologise if I'm sounding funny, cos I'm having a blocked nose (who's going to say: "Whatever..." :P). Flu is making the rounds...

Poof! It seems so long since I've last made a post, and well, it IS long... hahahaha. What with prelims and all...(that's not to say that I've been studying the whole time...), but at the same time I've been picking up a new language. Perhaps I'll be able to type it quite fluently soon...? (quite wishful thinking, it'll probably take a long time...(I HATE grammar))

To be honest, I don't have much more to say. I'll be updating my F1 blog(http://thunder-nemesis-of-the-south.blogspot.com/) later though. I think Alonso is a bad loser.

We apologise for the inconvienience caused...

ok I would have liked to talk in detail all that happened today, but now I'm so tired that I can hardly move and at the same time I'm having a headache. I think I have to go to sleep early, I'll just talk about everything tomorrow. I think.